I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
