Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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