I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
