let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
