Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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