He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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