is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
