Sponge bath it is.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
