marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
