I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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