well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm eating all of the evidence.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
