You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
