I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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