you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
