Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
