No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
