I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
one two three fourrrrnication!
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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