God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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