the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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