so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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