yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
