Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
