She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
