Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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