do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Randomize
