The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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