Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize