walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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