god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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