My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
