i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
