We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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