This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Randomize
