I wish I could punch you in the face.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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