when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
