singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Randomize
