News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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