He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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