This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
