after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
