is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
