it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
