Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
BRING THE BAGELS
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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