I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i think i have herpe
just one?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
