god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
