I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I forgot how hot balto sounded
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
