At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize