Don't you send me to vm
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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