Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize