Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
The struggles of a small town man whore
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
